Wednesday, 30 May 2007

bleh

Over the weekend, Button was sick. Really sick. I was a little sick too, but nowhere near as sick. We were hopeful that that was it and I wouldn't get what he had. Only, this morning I woke up ... and then wished I hadn't. I started feeling particularly icky last night, but I went to the game anyway [and a damn good thing I did, but more on that later...] This morning I feel rather awful, but Button assures me that there's another day or two to go before it gets really bad. Thanks.

As for yesterday's game - it was a good thing I went. Since Simon and I were the only players present. So Kamenosuke and Ishie did stuff, and set off for winter court ... Kamenosuke managed to make everything very awkward, and then made everything better again ["So, I hear you're the one responsible for practically wiping out the people I was fostered to" "Uh..."], Ishie experimented with a multi-element spell, while keeping an eye on Kamenosuke [does he really think she'll let him go down to the river alone when there are women looking at him like that?] And Ishie had a few very nice conversations...
She spoke to Nagataka about rocks ... Nagataka appeared a little dazed, but no doubt appreciated being enlightened on a topic he knew so little about, she spoke to her father about how she should marry an Agasha [note, he said Agasha, NOT Isawa, Agasha!]. She had a very illuminating chat with Sedami about gemstones, while Kamenosuke was making things awkward. And in the middle of it all, no one was attacked, killed or died. A good session :)

And then, Simon and Adrianna tried to hold me hostage and feed me tea. I declined, however, as it was latish [and it certainly would have been if I'd let them keep me there and feed me tea!], and I wanted to go home and go to bed. And I felt a little icky. Not as bad as this morning though...

And... I don't have very much else to say, except that I want my bed now... Sleepy.

Wednesday, 23 May 2007

Go away world.

I spent last night roleplaying. I spent a lot longer roleplaying than I should have [and naughty Button was in the bath when I got home at some unearthly hour of the morning!] I stayed so late 'cause I was really enjoying it. So having the real world intruding into my life right now is not pleasant.

So, things to remember:
Everything happens for a reason.
Everything will turn out for the best.
There is a lesson to be learnt in everything.
Stop bloody worrying about it, there's nothing you can do anyway.

If you have any ... useful suggestions along the same lines, feel free to let me know.

The game was lots of fun though! Hideo's uncle arrived [and Sean wrote his name on one of his index cards, with Hideos Uncle in brackets beside it. Everytime I saw it I thought it said 'hideous uncle']. Nagataka and I went rock hunting [it was great!]. We went to listen to a story teller, with a rather curious resemblance to Kamenosuke. Kamenosuke and I arranged for Keiko's swords to be boxed. And then Kamenosuke suggested that Keiko should interact with the swords on a more physical level. Let's just hope no one ever asks me 'cause I can't lie and then bad things would happen.
Came no closer to finding my sister. Kamenosuke suggested I look around for someone to marry and then inform my family so that I wouldn't have to marry some strange Isawa. It's certainly an idea I'm willing to consider... But then things might start getting complicated. It would have to be a Phoenix [unless you'd like to explain to my dead father why his 'favourite' daughter is marrying someone from another clan]... where am I going to find an available Phoenix male at winter court in the Katani Valley? I don't know, but I'm sure Kamenosuke will think of something, while we try to save him from having to marry a Lion...

Otherwise, I am having my usual Wednesday. Not enough sleep, so cranky. Too much to do, so extra cranky. Things to deal with, so overly cranky. Yoga tonight though, so that's good. I like yoga. It's one of my favourite things to do... Particularly since it doesn't involve interacting with other people.

Tuesday, 22 May 2007

Cranky

So, you go to see a doctor. Perfectly reasonable person. He diagnoses you and prescribes medication. Tells you to read up on your condition, directing you to his website. Which you do. You then discover that according to his website he doesn't think that the medication he's prescribed is useful. What do you do? Why, you email your doctor and ask him for clarification, don't you? I did. So do you expect a snitty email in response? No, you expect him to say, well, actually this that and whatever. You expect an explanation [I'm trying something out, I haven't updated that in a while, Sometimes the stuff works and you might be one of the lucky ones 'cause what you've got is better than the next step]. Do you get that? No, you get a snitty email from your doctor who seems to think you're questioning his wondrous medical powers. Uh, no, I just want you to explain things to me so that I understand. Don't think this is over. I've got papers and I'm bringing them with me, when next I go... We will have our explanations. We will understand.

And then you get an email from some friends of yours. They're having a thing. It's very exciting and you're wanting to be with them through it. But they have been saying different things to different people. They've finally gotten together and clarified what they really want. Pity there are only a few more days to go. A little bit of short notice to suddenly say 'hey, we've completely changed our minds and are retracting all those things we said'. Which annoys me. Particularly given their general capriciousness and the large likelihood of them holding your disagreement against you for the rest of your life. End friendship here. When you don't see people that often anyway, it's not that big a deal. It's difficult though 'cause this is special for them and you want it to be special for them but they're not making it easy on you. And you're cranky anyway 'cause your doctor is being unhelpful and not actually answering the questions you asked him.

And as if that's not bad enough, you have all these things dragging down on you. Friends you don't really like but don't have the heart to get rid of. So you have to listen to their whining and their 'you're my best friend' crap 'cause otherwise you might hurt their feelings and there's nothing they like more than to lay on the guilt nice and thick. But god forbid you suggest that they're manipulative.

Never mind the fact that you're trying to do your job and have stuff to do without having to deal with everyone else's problems too. Why are there people in my world? Why don't they all just go away and let me stay in bed and read my book all day? Why can't I just say "I don't want to deal with you right now, go away. We can come back to this another time" and have them actually listen to me? Why will I feel guilty for not emailing a girl I don't really know anymore and wishing her a happy birthday? When I don't care about her at all and have far more important things on my mind?

Monday, 21 May 2007

You'd think by now...

So, I went home early on Thursday. The internet was down on Friday... It's been a long morning catching up on everything...

So, without internet, Friday was slow and boring. KK and I helped the honours students with their stats project as much as we could... Eventually I tracked JS down and began my time with the poisonous chemicals. Which she assures me are not really that bad. It was absolutely exhausting, but she assures me that when I no longer have to concentrate so hard and getting just that extra drop, it'll be easier.

That evening, Button and I went to see Victory. It was very good. On the way there we were sent off the highway. Just before the speed camera, the entire highway was diverted into woodstock? Why? Who knows, they didn't tell anyone. Of course, on the way back we saw a car that was being removed. It looked like it had rolled... possibly there was a horrendous accident that we don't know about... that took over an hour to clear up...

On Saturday we went to yoga, which was more hectic than the previous yoga class... It was longer and a different kind of yoga. then we went shopping. Button was in need of clothes, which we bought. Some very nice clothes, in my personal opinion [which is the one that matters]. In the evening, we went to a celebration with some friends of Button's. We went ice-skating. Note to self: Never do that again. It was not a good evening. I don't cope well with ice skating. B didn't do much better, though he was certainly trying harder. At one point he and Button were skating together and they were knocked over by some moron. B ended up with a concussion and Button with a very sore arm/shoulder.

I don't think I did anything yesterday, but today is email the doctor's day... so off I go to do that...

Thursday, 17 May 2007

And I realise ... I'm ... going ... ho-o-ome

So, I am hanging around uct, doing absolutely nothing. JS isn't in yet and rumour has it she won't be in all day [so why aren't I at home in bed, I ask you?]... this is problematic as I need to do stuff with the poisonous chemicals and I want her around for the first one, just in case something doesn't go exactly right... I guess it's just going to have to wait until tomorrow then... which is okay, I'm not overly excited to spend time with those stinky chemicals again too soon...

Last night Button and I had our first yoga class. The lowest level offered by the gym. Should be a reasonably easygoing, simply, introductory class, right? Why, no, actually, not at all. While neither of us managed to work up a sweat, it was still physically and mentally exhausting. But very good for me, and I felt good too, so it was okay. And either it did some good or the medication is having an effect [but I'm more inclined to suspect the yoga, since the medication hasn't managed it yet], but I was much less sore this morning than one would expect for a cold wet morning... And it's off to belly-dancing tonight...

In other news: I really enjoyed tuesday's game. I know I've already said that and Adrianna did feel the need to apologise for the lack of action, but I really enjoyed it. It was the first one in ages where I wasn't in agony [yay heating pad], freezing to death [yay heating pad again! That, btw, is not a reflection on sidrianna's health, apparently temperature control issues are common to people with psoriasis/PA] or completely unable to pay attention. I was a little sleepy [medication], but it didn't get in the way.

Button's rheumatologist friend [who is not technically a rheumatologist yet, 'cause he's still got a couple of years of residency to go ... or something. I wasn't really paying that much attention when he explained it to me] is being very helpful, though providing us with many questions for my doctor, as well as other interesting references and so on... Yay for networking and stuff! Although, it is rather odd that someone he's known since he was 18 months old would turn out to be exactly the kind of doctor needed...

.............................................................
It's kind of strange when you keep putting up song lyrics for titles. Oh well, at least they're not country songs anymore.
But, as it says, I'm going home. LC has confirmed that JS will not be in today, so I'm going to go home and ... do something... it's a bit early to head over to my mother's house, but I think I might just do that anyway. I need to go to the library, I'm hungry...

Wednesday, 16 May 2007

stench of poison...

It's been a while... I've been very busy...

We had the game last night, which was great. We got rid of the tainted courtesan [yay]. We got a letter that at least two of us were very upset to discover was not for Kamenosuke, but myself. While the news wasn't quite as awful as I presumed it would be, it comes pretty close... Fun was had by all.

Tonight, Button and I are going to our first yoga class. I'm quite excited. I expect it to have a huge effect on my aching joints... And I'm sure it will eventually.

Button and I went out on Friday with a whole bunch of people, it was fun. They know who they are and I'm not in the mood to think up silly names for all of them... We saw Tosca on saturday - it was very good.

Getting to UCT this morning, to discover mould growing in my bone powder did nothing to help my mood. I got rid of it [and hopefully it will stay gone] and am now messing about with poisonous chemicals. They stink, and the hand cream doesn't disguise the smell [I think that's because it's on my lab coat, not my hands ... I certainly hope so 'cause I was wearing gloves and they're very poisonous!] I took all the precautions that you're supposed to though, so I don't expect any problems.

Wednesday, 09 May 2007

Had enough now....

Let's get one thing clear, people. I am the one who is sick. I am the one with the life being affected by a chronic, incurable disease. Not you. You should be being sympathetic, comforting and consoling towards me. I should not have to comfort and console you. Yes, I understand that you're worried and concerned and only behaving that way because you care. The point is that I have enough to deal without adding all of your issues on top of that. So all of you who are requiring me to be your anchor, stop it. [I was going to say something ruder, but my mother reads this!]

Anyway, it was off to the roleplaying game last night. Very nice, since I missed at least last week, possibly the week before [we're unsure as to when it was that Adrianna was sick]. It was fun, even without my character sheet. I had my heating pad with me 'cause I was quite sore. It helped. At the very least I'm not as sore today as I was yesterday.

Today is going to be a busy day. I am currently at uct, waiting for JS. One of the tests I was marking has two different handwritings on it - possibly they're two different handwritings of one person, but I can't be sure. I need to do a little bit of work on my project [including cleaning out the mill :(]. Later on I'm going to the museum to do some work there...

Tuesday, 08 May 2007

We're Not Exactly Strangers, But We're Not Exactly Friends

It's particularly worrisome when the song that seems to describe your feelings is country music. Not that I have anything against country music, quite the contrary actually. I'm rather fond of whiny female singing and country music is full of it...

Anyway, I'm at the museum today, and very sore. I brought my heating pad with me and it's helping. I've been doing quite a bit of typing which seems to be helping my hands this morning. Sadly that's not necessarily reliable... But it's working at the moment, aside from the occasional twinge, so I'm not going to complain. On to more pressing matters... I was pleasantly surprised yesterday when I started choking and the giant rugby ball ... and then instead of coming back up as it tends to do, I swallowed it! In addition to which, I'd already swallowed all the others! I was very surprised as my previous experience with pill-swallowing-attempts is that this never happens.

Work is going slowly, but that's okay since I usually work rather quickly, according to my boss at any rate. Besides which, I explained everything to her, so she's understanding.

Monday, 07 May 2007

Come on in and wear your welcome out

Those of you who come by whenever I can be bothered to write stuff [and those of you who I know read it through feeds] will be aware of certain medical problems that have been plaguing me of late.
So, I have a diagnosis now - Psoriatic Arthritis. Psoriasis is an auto-immune disease that affects the skin. It appears similar to eczema, though without the blistering and cracking. About 5% - 30% of people with Psoriasis get PA. There are five different types of PA and I have the symmetrical type - the one most likely to affect women and the one that appears similar to rheumatoid arthritis. There are a couple of good websites - the Mayo Clinic, the National Psoriasis Foundation in the US and my doctor's website.
Let me just say right now - it's not as bad as it could be [or might get]. If you do a google image search [which I don't recommend for the squeamish, myself included], you will quickly realise that I'm nowhere near as bad as that yet.

If there's anything you want to know, ask... I know there's quite a lot of information I'm leaving out here. While I'm coping admirably, it's still a little difficult to wrap one's brain aroudn the fact that one has gone from 'oh, my joints are a bit sore...' to 'I have a chronic incurable disease'.

Anyway, Button and I went shopping on Saturday. We bought some ice packs [cold to numb the pain] and a heating pad [so wonderful!]... while there I had a phone call from my poor sister. She'd spoken to my mother who had completely forgotten who she was talking to [apparently] and made the mistake of telling her things like the worst that could happen is that I might end up in a wheelchair. Well, yes, but not anytime soon! She told her that I might need to take immune-system-suppressants. Yes, I might. But there are a number of other treatment steps before that - and it might never get to that! So my poor sister was in an absolute panic [it appears that my family is particularly prone to that sort of thing]... But I think she's feeling better now.

Button also bought me a very pretty pill-keeping thing. Which is much less scary than the bottles and boxes and so on... I'm not good with pills, however I did manage to swallow four out of five last night! I'm very proud of myself [and you should be too]. The only one I haven't managed is the excessively enormous salmon oil one [apparently it's a natural anti-inflammatory, as well as Omega-3 being very good for me]... why must it be the size of a rugby ball, I ask you?

Anyway, the medicines are taking effect, as I am feeling much better this morning...

Oh, and happy birthday to David [Blake]. Sorry I never got back to you about the Miller's thing - I'm sure you'll understand that I was a little distracted.